After my Mom died, it took me a lot longer to process than I anticipated. I thought I would be back into the full swing of things a month or two after she passed. I didn’t realize until Mother’s Day 2023 just how brokenhearted I was about missing her. That night, I stood in the shower, water beating down on me and I wept. Every breath felt like shards of glass inside of me. I prayed, “God, I am a strong woman, but please remember that I am just a person. I’m made from clay. I can’t do this on my own. I need You.”
God heard the cry of my heart and The Holy Spirit started working on my heart in a powerful way. About two weeks after that, I was working at my desk and suddenly a vision flashed in my spirit. I don’t know how to exactly explain a vision except that you can see something with your spirit that your physical eyes cannot see. I could see my Mom in heaven. She was young and radiant and oh-so-beautiful. Her eyes danced playfully as she looked at me as she stood beside a big body of water that looked like a river. Everything about her and everything around her was absolutely glowing.
A week after that, I was praying and said, “Thank You, Jesus, for letting me see my Mom. I needed to see that. She looked so happy when she was looking at me.” His answer surprised me. I heard Him say in my spirit, “She wasn’t looking at you. She was looking at ME. I was letting you see her through MY eyes.”
Every tear stopped in that moment. That was 6 months after my Mom passed away. He turned all that sorrow into great joy! He has taught me that she isn’t “gone” like I found myself saying over and over after she passed away. Instead, she’s “gone ahead.” Christ words have brought me so much healing in what was absolute shattered heartbreak and He’s turned my mourning into joy.
I spent a lot of time getting re-focused last year. I spent some time as a photo data analyst and as an executive assistant in traditional office roles while photographing at a small scale on the side because I just needed to be around people in that season and it helped a lot! Now, I have transitioned back to full-time photography. I am also writing. God laid it on my heart almost 20 years ago to start writing a book and a Christian women’s conference and I’m finally doing that!
My days right now are spent on photography and writing. It feels a little weird to be back working from home, because I had gotten so used to going into an office every day, but I’m also relishing in it and so looking forward to being a full-time photographer again.
The moment I quit my executive assistant job, without telling anyone, I immediately received inquiries for many photo sessions and my schedule is filling up for the spring. I know this was a move God was making to provide for my husband and I and also to encourage me as I step back into this role.
2024 is a new season and I’m excited for what lies ahead! Here is to the first happy steps. 🙂
Contact me for your next photo session:
Alicia – 480-399-3030 | alicia@bebaphotography
http://www.BebaPhotography.com
http://www.BebaBusinessPhotography.com
Beba Photography 